Thursday, January 05, 2006

Serial Shagger

Bag Puss has asked me not to cut him out of my life. But I don't see how I can stay friends with him.

When we split up, he said I was to use the following two weeks to think about things. Then he decided I should think about things for a couple of months, because two weeks wasn't long enough. He told me he loved me. I told him I loved him too. Which I do. He told me it wasn't over for us, as such, that he felt we could be together again in the future. I was just to think through what I really wanted first.

He's visited me here in Edinburgh (he's from a different city), and it's been the same as ever. Hugs, cuddles, kisses, etc. Like we were still together, only not. It was lovely, but so hard.

While I was still thinking about things, he's gone off with someone else.

Now, I know he had every right to do that. I'd dumped him, he was single. But, oh my god, how it hurts.

It's so quick, like I never mattered at all. Barely over a month later and he's with someone else. "It was a slap in the face, how quickly I was replaced," keeps going round my head.

He keeps saying I'll find a new if he's refusing to understand why we split up. I've told him and told him how afraid of pregnancy I the point where I can see myself alone for the rest of my life rather than be pregnant again. But still the comments about new men, new romance. For crying out loud, if I feel I can't be with the man I love, I'm hardly going to be chancing pregnancy with someone else, am I?

My Mum reckons he's a serial shagger, a typical man, she says.

Yes, I know I'm whinging, and it's very one-sided. Of course it is. But where better to spill ?


Anonymous Hannah said...

Hey doll,
Seems so unfair doesn't it... how he can so easily 'pull'... out of circumstance, but also cos of how quickly it has happened.

But I don't think that time works the same way for boys... I still hurt when I think of my first love... 5 years later, and while I'm in a lovely relationship, that seems truly odd. But us girls just deal with things differently. We feel... something that I seriously doubt boys do sometimes!

I bet for Bagpuss, it's more of a comfort thing... a rebound thing... a sex thing. Doesn't mean that one day, once you've sorted your head and your contraception out, that you may not get back together.

Although I do think that considering he was the one who suggested the 2 months to think idea, that he should have held off shagging other people for those 2 months... cos if he loves you, then wouldn't he wait and see?

I don't know.

But I can remember the hurt... and I'm sorry you're hurting.


4:10 AM  
Blogger Aine said...

Hi honey,

Well that's what I would have thought too. But he thinks the best way to get over me is to dive right in to a relationship with someone else.

Better to take a chance on someone he doesn't really know, than me who has split up with him, and thus proved what a bitch I am...or something!

Ach well, at least he'll get some with someone who isn't freaking out all the time. Good luck to him.

5:25 AM  

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